Big Brother and Big Sister Gift Ideas + Tips to Prepare Siblings for a New Baby
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Preparing for a baby when you already have a kid at home is a whole different project. The second time around, a HUGE chunk of my prep had nothing to do with the baby. It was about my firstborn: where he’d be during the birth, what would happen to his routine, and how exactly I was supposed to get him ready for a new sibling.
Nothing can fully prepare a little kid for a change this big (I’m not convinced anything fully prepares the adults either). But a little planning really does help. Talking about the baby ahead of time, reading big brother and big sister books, and giving a special gift “from the baby” can all make the transition a lot smoother. So below you’ll find my favorite big brother and big sister gift ideas, my thoughts on when to actually give the gift, and tips for preparing kids of different ages for the new baby.
Big brother and big sister gifts from the new baby
Before my second baby arrived, I put together a sibling gift basket for Walter, my first. The gift was “from the baby,” and I told him from the start that when the baby came, he’d be getting a present from his new sibling. I wanted him to feel excited about the baby and special in his new role, so I went for a full Christmas-morning feel, with lots of fun stuff for him to play with.
I think the reason this helps is pretty simple. When a new baby comes home, almost all the attention goes to the baby, and a gift from the baby gives your older kid something of their OWN to be excited about. It doesn’t have to be big, though. One small, thoughtful gift can do the same job as a full basket, and I really don’t think there’s a right or wrong way to do it.
When to give the sibling gift
The most common time is the first meeting, when big brother or big sister sees the baby for the first time. That’s what we did, although the decision was kind of made for us. I gave birth to my second during COVID, when no visitors were allowed at the hospital, so Walter met his brother at home and got his gifts right then.
If your hospital allows sibling visits, giving the gift there works too. Some families bring it from home and have it waiting next to the bassinet when the older kid walks in. If you go this route, add it to your hospital bag checklist so it doesn’t get left at home in the chaos. Others wait for the first meeting at home, so the big moment happens somewhere familiar instead of in a hospital room with people coming in and out every twenty minutes.
Looking back, I’d also spread things out. Walter LOVED his basket, but my guess is he would have stayed interested in the toys a lot longer if he hadn’t gotten them all at once. If I did it again, I’d give a smaller basket at the first meeting and hold back a couple of treats or activity-type toys to pull out over the first two to three weeks, while everyone is still adjusting.
One gift or a whole basket?
This really depends on your kid (and your budget). A basket makes the moment feel like an EVENT, which is great for a kid who loves a big reveal. A single gift, like a special toy or a book about becoming a big sibling, is just as meaningful and a lot easier to pull together in the third trimester. If you do go the basket route, a mix works well: one or two baby-themed things, a couple of open-ended toys, and a book or two.
A separate basket for feeding time
I also put together a separate basket just for nursing time. The idea is to keep a few special toys and activities that ONLY come out while you’re feeding the baby. Since your older kid doesn’t get to play with them the rest of the day, the novelty keeps them busy while your hands (and your lap) are taken.
I’ll be honest, this one did not work very well for us. I wasn’t great about only bringing it out during feedings, and the novelty wore off pretty quickly for Walter, who was three and a half at the time. I do think it could work really well with a younger sibling, though, especially around 1 to 2 years old, when a basket of toys they don’t normally see can buy you a calm feeding. It works the same way whether you’re breastfeeding or bottle-feeding.
Big brother and big sister gift ideas
When I put Walter’s basket together, I mostly went with open-ended toys I knew he’d love for imaginative play. But you can absolutely lean into the baby theme instead. It really comes down to knowing your kid:
Baby-themed gifts let your little one “work” right alongside you while you take care of the newborn.
Open-ended toys give them their own little play world to disappear into while you’re busy with the baby.
These ideas are best for kids roughly 2 to 6. If you want even more options, I keep a running list of my top toy picks on Amazon. Whatever you pick, check the age label on the package. Toys with small parts are a choking hazard for kids under 3, and it’s worth keeping tiny pieces put away regardless, because your newborn will eventually be crawling around and putting literally everything in their mouth.
Gifts that let them copy you
Baby doll: A great choice for boys AND girls. Look for one that represents your family.
Baby carrier for dolls: You’ll probably be wearing your baby a lot, and a doll carrier lets your older kid do exactly what you’re doing.
Baby doll accessories: A little doll diaper bag with pretend bottles and diapers means they can take care of their baby right next to you taking care of yours.
Gifts that keep them busy
Kids camera: This was Walter’s favorite, and a HUGE hit. He can use it pretty independently, and since Ryland arrived, he loves taking pictures of the baby and showing him the photos.
Play dough or silly putty: Always a hit. Walter goes crazy for silly putty.
Water Wow coloring set: No mess, and they really hold my kid’s attention, which makes them perfect for a feeding-time basket (they’re labeled 3+, so check the age on the package for younger siblings).
Small figurines or animals: Walter LOVES tiny things, and these are great for imaginative play. Save them for kids over 3 because of the small parts.
Pretend play kits: Doctor kits, tool sets, play food...anything that sparks imaginative play is a winner.
Building sets: If you don’t already have open-ended building toys, they’re a great addition. We love Magna-Tiles and classic wooden blocks.
Little extras that celebrate the new title
Matching pajamas for big sibling and baby: Burt’s Bees are my fave for these. Look for a print that comes in both kid and baby sizes.
Big sister bracelet: So cute and special for the big-sister-to-be. Save beaded ones for big sisters over 3.
Big brother cape: A fun one for the big-brother-to-be.
Big brother and big sister books
Books are one of the easiest ways to help a kid understand what’s coming, and they make a nice addition to any sibling gift. For toddlers, sturdy board books about a new baby work best. Preschoolers and older kids can handle picture books that get into the feelings that come with a new sibling, like being excited, feeling left out, or somehow both at the same time. I also threw in a few books about things Walter was already obsessed with, which helped the gift feel like it was about HIM and not just the baby.
How to prepare siblings for a new baby
Preparing your older kids before the baby arrives makes a real difference. Until now, life has revolved around your firstborn, and even in bigger families, a new baby shifts the whole dynamic. I’ll never forget a friend telling me her daughter very innocently asked, “So when do we bring the baby BACK to the hospital?”
How you prepare is going to depend a lot on your kid’s age. A five- or six-year-old can wrap their head around what’s happening WAY better than a two-year-old. If your kids are really close in age, one upside is that they’ll never really know life without each other. No matter the age gap, though, a little preparation helps.
My own experience is having a second baby with a three-and-a-half-year-old at home, so I also asked a lot of other parents for their tips to cover different ages. I also talked about this with Devon Kuntzman from Transforming Toddlerhood on the podcast, including what behaviors to expect and how to handle that first meeting.
Toddlers (1 to 2 years)
Read big brother or big sister board books together.
Let them watch and help as you get baby things ready, and talk about how these things are for “the baby.”
Have them feel the baby kick. A baby inside your belly is a VERY abstract concept for a toddler, and this makes it a little more real.
Visit a friend with a baby, or point out babies when you’re out, and talk about what the baby is doing.
Practice taking care of a baby doll or stuffed animal together, with gentle hands and quiet voices. You can start this one with kids as young as 10 to 12 months.
Talk about what newborns are like, especially how little they actually do. This works best with kids closer to 2.
Watch shows about new siblings. The Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood episodes about Daniel’s new baby sister are a great place to start, and PBS has a short clip of Daniel finding out he’s going to be a big brother.
Preschoolers (3 to 6 years)
Read big brother or big sister books and ask open-ended questions. Let your kid lead the conversation.
Walk them through exactly what will happen when it’s time for you to go to the hospital, including who will take care of them and when they’ll see you again. Changes in routine are hard on little kids, and hearing the story ahead of time helps a LOT.
Explain how newborns act. Walter was genuinely surprised that the baby couldn’t play or do much of anything. Talk about what newborns do (and don’t do) and how they need help with everything.
Look at photos and videos from when your kid was a new baby, and talk about how you took care of them.
Get them involved in baby prep, like washing baby clothes, setting up a diaper caddy, and testing out baby gear.
Pretend-play with a doll to practice how to act around a newborn.
If you can, finish big transitions like potty training or moving to a big-kid bed before the baby comes. If that’s not realistic, wait until things settle down afterward. Learning something new on top of getting a new sibling is A LOT.
Brainstorm a list together of quiet activities they can do while the baby sleeps.
Watch the Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood new baby episodes. My friend’s daughter LOVED them and watched them on repeat leading up to her sibling’s birth.
School-age kids
Older kids still benefit from intentional prep. They understand more, but this is still a BIG change, and talking through what to expect helps.
Give them a bigger role in getting ready. Older kids can help a lot with organizing, decorating, and even picking out things for the baby, and feeling like part of the preparations can help them start bonding before the baby arrives.
Set realistic expectations about how much attention a newborn needs. Brainstorm together ways they can help, things they can do while you’re taking care of the baby, and things you can all do together with the baby. Having a concrete list to look back on really helps.
Borrow any of the preschool tips that fit, and adjust them for your kid’s maturity level.
Introducing the new baby to big brother or big sister
When Walter met Ryland, the first meeting wasn’t very dramatic. He was honestly more excited about the gifts than the baby, and you know what? That was FINE. We tend to build this moment up in our heads, but the best thing you can do is follow your kid’s lead. And if your older kid suddenly starts acting a little younger for a while (potty accidents, wanting a bottle, that kind of thing), that’s really common and usually their way of making sure they still have your attention. A few things that can help with the first meeting:
Greet your older kid first, ideally while you’re not holding the baby. They probably haven’t seen you in a few days, so give them a big hug and make the first moment all about them.
Have the baby somewhere neutral, like a bassinet, instead of in someone’s arms. This can be especially helpful with younger kids.
Show them how to be gentle, like touching the baby’s toes or patting their belly. If your kid is old enough to hold the baby, have them ask you first, then sit them down, help support the baby’s head and neck, and stay right next to them.
Getting through the first weeks with two (or more)
This could honestly be a whole post of its own (I talked about my first year as a mom of two on the podcast too), but here’s what helped me most in the first few weeks with two kids:
Let go of the house. I know you’ve heard this a million times, but I’m saying it again. If clutter really gets to you, tell your partner that keeping it under control is a concrete way they can help, or lean on other people to pitch in.
Stock your freezer before the baby arrives. Meals you can dump in the slow cooker or throw in the oven might matter even MORE the second time, because everyone still needs to eat and everyone is a lot happier with real food.
Prep food for your older kid ahead of time. Even getting Walter a snack or lunch on the table felt hard some days after Ryland was born. I started packing his lunch the night before, or while Ryland was snoozing in the morning, and it helped SO much.
Make things easy for big brother or big sister to grab. If they’re old enough, keep snacks within reach and set up activity bins with everything they need for a simple project. Craft bins (stickers, kid-safe scissors, paper, markers) and play dough bins are a big hit around here.
Know that it’s going to be hard. I’m all about realistic expectations. Going from one kid to two is a big change for everyone, and it takes a while to find your groove. You will find it, though.
A little prep goes a long way
If you’re reading this, you’re already thinking about how to make this change easier on your older kids, and that counts for a lot. A gift from the new baby is a simple way to help them feel excited about their new title. Just don’t be surprised if the gift turns out to be the most exciting part of the day. In my experience, that’s completely fine.
~Liesel
